Method of Want
by HoeOfGrimdark
Summary: Canada keeps his dark side covered up well until he hears his lover calls his brothers name then Canada loses it. Warnings inside. Prologue is only up.
1. Chapter 1

A/N: I don't think I am going to continue any of my other stories. I have lost major motivation for them. I might continue them later. I will delete some of them when I sort my account out. Sorry, my life has took a turn for the worst and I just wanna scream. Writing usually makes me feel better.

**Anime: Hetalia Axis Powers**

**Paring(s): CanadaXFrance and FranceXAmerica**

**Warning(s): Rape, gore and violence.**

_**Prologue**_

"Canada, not America, Canada,"

"Still doesn't ring a bell,"

"Stupid American pig,"

"I-I-I'm not Amer-,"

"I can smell the hamburgers and obnoxiousness off of you,"

"I-I-I'm Canada,"

"... Oh sorry man, I thought it was America,"

"What's a Canada? Isn't that America?"

"What's a Canada?"

"Amer- Oh Canada, I didn't see you there,"

"Of course you didn't … no one-,"

"That's great America,"

"It's Canada"

"Hey Matthieu, is something wrong?"

Canada raised his head from his daydream. He wasn't paying much attention to his surroundings at the world meeting, so it wouldn't be much of a surprise to see that most people had gone and it was the end of the meeting. All except France, his papa.

"Oh, nothing," Canada said quickly getting up, "I wasn't paying much attention,"

"I could tell," France said giving a chuckle, "Some thing's troubling you mon cher? You haven't been yourself?"

"I'm fine,"Canada stood up, "I really am," Canada said and France nodded but Canada could tell he didn't believe the pointless façade. No one did. His other friends never did and his papa never did. Canada put a smile on before changing the subject. "So, you staying here for the night or are you catching the plane tonight?"

"Unfortunately I cannot catch the plane tonight so I will be staying at a hotel," France answered him..

"Oh, I will be going home... as I don't leave far," Canada said stating the obvious. The world meeting was help in America so it wouldn't take Canada that long to get home. Canada was thinking about asking France to stay with him. They hadn't been together since god knows when and Canada missed France a lot, "Would you want to stay.. if you're not busy or anything?"

France smirked, "That would be divine,"

It was simple as that. France and Canada walked out together. Canada never felt alone with France. France was generally a good soul. He couldn't understand the rapist rumour that went around with some nations. France would probably be the least likely person to commit an act of sexual assault. Canada always admired France for many reasons, they weren't blood related but Canada still called France "papa" because he was his parental figure. He never really forgot about Canada and you could say Canada had a ...crush on France.

But he pushed it to the side because lately, France had been talking to America. Canada didn't want to make assumptions but he knew that France was flirting with America. Sometimes Canada had these thoughts... really bad thoughts... about how he could prevent France and America but that was only a dark side. Canada would never hurt France or America to get what he wanted... even when he wanted to. Canada was a sweet innocent soul but... he had that other side to him.

It's only natural to have a dark side. We go through live with two options, good or bad. More often, you choose good but there is always the bad option which people don't tend to take but when life gets them, they take bad. Canada, despite being a sweet soul, had that side. Every time someone called him America, he thought terrible thoughts. He even had terrible thoughts about France. Every time he saw France flirting or throwing himself at someone, there is that little voice in Canada's head that says "... you know, you could make France yours," but Canada ignored that and thankfully he did. He did need force to make someone love him. France and him were already close so it couldn't be that hard.. right?

Canada didn't usually come out about his dark side to anyone. No one does. Who would tell people the demons they keep locked up but what if one day... Canada's demons came out and attacked someone he loved dearly. Wouldn't that be a tragedy? But isn't that what makes a good story? A tragedy? Something glossy, gritty and exciting? Isn't that what people want to hear?

Sit back. Think about your demons. Would you let yours out?


	2. Authors Note

Hello Megan here. I know I haven't been updating but it's a sort of long story.

To put it short, I've lost a lot of self confidence. I'm struggling to find my talents in life and all that. I also started self harming and tried to starve myself. It's been a difficult few months for me but I will be carrying on hopefully with some of my fanfics. I won't be carrying on with _Gaslight, __Omerta_and a few others. I will only really be continuing with Method of Want and my UkFra oneshots. I apologise for not continuing and I'm sorry for being inactive.

On a brighter side, would anybody be interesting in a story swap? I love writing stories for other people. They might not be good but I'll try.


	3. Chapter 2

**A/N: I'm really grateful for all the kind messages people sent. I may not of replied but it inspired me to stop. I'm going to my guidance teacher tomorrow so she can help me tell my parents. I'm really scared but I know it will help. I have a few one shots on the go from when I was feeling depressed. They are all really gory snapped!CanadaXFrance fics. I will write in my next chapter how it goes at my school. I have a new blog up and running on tumblr if anyone's interested in keeping up to date. I also follow back. My blog is hoeofgrimdark d0t tumblr d0t com I mostly blog Hetalia and Pewdiepie (that dude is my alternative to cutting)**

It was a night of wine, food and comfort. Canada found this a whole lot better. He really did enjoy France's company. He was lovely to Canada and vice-versa. Canada always enjoy the Frenchman being in his home. He didn't get much visitors and he was glad France was one of them. He often visited France also. So how they hell were they not dating? Canada often wondered what France thought of his, a friend, a son or something more special. He knew what France was like, a bit promiscuous but he was always like that. When Canada was a baby, France was constantly having on and relationships with other countries, particularly England. They were together, then splitting up then back together. It's sort of calmed down since, mainly France had his one night stands but it had seemed as if he was having an interest in America recently.

This upset Canada. He wondered what was so good about America that France wanted him over Canada. He remembered how America was confident... a little too confident. He spoke his mind... when when no one asked and he wanted to be the hero... a little too often. What was there to hate? Except everything. Canada on the other hand was the opposite from his brother. He wasn't very confident and was afraid to speak up at world meetings. He never spoke his mind because too often, no one ever asked. What was there to like?

During the night, France had gotten drunk red wine. They were sitting on the couch together, right next to each other. They had been catching up, speaking about their lives recently. It was obvious France was drunk, he was swaying slightly and was beginning to ask really embarrassing questions.

"So, you have a girlfriend yet?" France asked curiously.

"No... I don't," Canada said looking down, "I don't know much girls... they're all in relationships,"

"I don't know, Ukraine is single and she's pretty hot," France said with a wink, "So is Belarus, but depending on what you're into. Liechtenstein is single.. but too young, I think Belgium might be single... I can get you a girlfriend? Seychelles is single?"

"No that's fine, Seychelles is like a sister... since she's practically your daughter," Canada said with a nervous laugh.

"Oh well...," France said trailing off a bit, "What about a boyfriend?"

"W-what?"

"You know there's nothing wrong for swinging for both teams, or the other team,"

"I know there isn't!" Canada said with a blush covering his whole face, "... I don't have a boyfriend,"

"Awh but what about Cuba?" France said with yet another wink that Canada tried to avoid, "You two are friends?"

"Friends... doesn't make us in a relationship!"

"Fine," France said with a smirk, "You crushing on someone?"

"_Yes, you," _It was what Canada wanted to say, "I-I don't know,"

"Come one, you can tell your papa," France beckoned with that to die for accent.

"I don't think I do," Canada went to quickly change the subject, "What about you? Do you have a girlfriend?"

"Non," France answered shrugging his shoulders.

"Boyfriend?"

"Non,"

"Crushing on anyone?" Canada was regretting it as it came out of his mouth. He knew France would say America.

"Well...," France was drifting off, "I am absolutely infatuated with someone,"

"Who is that?" Canada asked tilting his head as if he didn't know

"Guess!" France said smirking.

"Ughh," Canada groaned, "Just tell me?"

"No, guess," France said with a laugh, " It's really obvious,"

".. England?"

France pretended to gag, "Non! Never again!"

"Spain?"

"Not a bad choice," France smirked, "but no,"

"Prussia?"

"He's dating Austria," France said, "So non,"

"Oh," Canada said, "I don't know,"

"Come on," France purred, "It's so obvious,"

"...America?" Canada regretted it.

"Non," France said then laughed, "Do you want a clue?" He asked then Canada nodded as he was clueless. Suddenly France leaned over and placed his hand under Canada's chin and pressed their lips together. Canada was.. stunned. He was in shock, eyes were wide as he watched France kiss him. France was in love with him? It was soon but Canada was amazed he felt the same. France soon pulled away and smirked.

"You got it now?" He chuckled a little.

"... Me?" Canada went completely red, "..how?"

"... I'll show you," France said in a low, seductive voice as he pushed his lips against Canada's again. It was perfect, passionate and just beautiful. France's other hand went straight to Canada's jeans before the Frenchman moved himself off the sofa and on the ground to get between the others legs. Canada watched him and let him do what was needed. It was amazing. Canada's blood was rushing straight to his groin and his jeans were suddenly becoming too tight for him and he could tell France was loving it... although... France was pretty drunk.

The Frenchman's hands went straight for his zip and pulled it down before his hands pulled out Canada's half hard cock. A smirk was plastered on France's face and Canada buried his face in his hands going as red as Spain's tomatoes. Without any longer, France took Canada's cock into his mouth. France was very experience so he knew that Canada would enjoy it and Canada just watched France. From the angle, France was beautiful.

"Oh god, Francis," Canada groaned as France started to bob his head up and down, slurping as he sucked hard on his cock. France smirked and moved his hands to hold and rub what couldn't be fitted in his mouth. It felt amazing and all Canada could so was buck his hips and moan as France's tongue worked wonders. France's tongue teased Canada's slit before taking Canada fully in his mouth, deep throating him.

"G-god dammit France," Canada moaned bucking his hips up. France smirked before taking Canada out with a audible "pop". Canada groaned at the loss.

"Now now," France said smirking, "Don't want you coming just yet!" France stumbled getting onto the couch, "Shall I? Or do you want to?" France said stumbling forward a little and nearly falling on poor Canada.

"You're too drunk France," Canada said making sure France didn't fall over. Demon one: Usually if someone was so drunk they could not move, you wouldn't have sex with them but Canada was having his chance. France fell backwards and started giggling, "Look, I'll do it," Canada said crawling over France who purred and just lay back while Canada's hands went to slip off France's trousers. France was shifting his erection to get some amount of pleasure. He was surprised Canada was taking control, if he was sober, he would of made sure he topped but he wasn't really thinking straight with the drink and Canada now getting rid of his boxers so France's rather large erection was now out.

Canada reached over the table, a handy bottle of cream sat there. Canada picked it up and then covered his fingers in the cream for lubricant. France spread his legs a little, waiting for Canada. Canada slipped the first finger in, it was tight and France bit down on his lip hard. The second finger slipped in quickly after and scissor so France loosened up a bit. Canada didn't top, the few times he had sex he did not top but his papa was drunk and stumbling all over him.

Morals would tell you not to bother and get the other to sleep but something stopped Canada from doing that. It made Canada want to fuck him.

Canada removed his fingers and France shifted his hips from the uncomfortable feeling of not having something in him. Canada slicked himself up with the cream before having his cock at France's entrance and then pushed in. His face twisted into one of pleasure as he was embraced by a tight heat. France looked up, watching the slightly taller nations face. His own red and flushed as something rather large and long was filling him up. France pushed against him to get more and more, the alcohol made the pain a little more sweeter. There was nothing better then drunken sex, even if he was the only one drunk.

So Canada got faster and started to fuck him as soon as France begged him for it. France put his long slender legs around Canada and held onto the younger male. The drunken daze made the pain less and the pleasure more. It was bliss. Canada still felt sort of bad, France needed to rest to get rid of the drunkenness but it's hard when France is sprawled out on the couch all sweaty and begging for it. The man was beautiful, feminine and soft to touch. It was beautiful and Canada could say no after a love confession. After a while, with a scream and a moan France bucked his hips forwards and came onto his and Canada's stomachs. Canada not long after came inside before collapsing on France's chest.

Silence.

"P-papa," Canada whimpered slowly slipping out and lying on top of France's chest. France smiled and looked down, half awake.

"Oui?"

"Do you mean it?" Canada said hugging into him more.

France sat up a bit and held on to his Canada, "Every moment of it,"

"You're mine," Canada yawned into his chest before falling asleep then France giggled.

"Of course, I'm yours,"

_Mine? Yours? Mine, yours, mine, yours?_

_Where's the balance?_

A/N Ending was rushed I know but yeah. Some serious shits gonna go down later involving America. I can't decide who I want to pair France with at the end. Depends whether I want a happy ending or not.


	4. Chapter 3

A/N:

A few weeks later.

One night turned into a boyfriend of a few months. They were seen as a perfect couple. Well, they weren't because one night, Canada started to change since he realised something about France that was quite useful. Something that would be useful to hold against France. It was because one day, Prussia and Spain invited France out.

"You look smart," Canada remarked on France's snazzy clothes. It wasn't the casual "jeans and a shirt" kind of thing. France was busy making sure his hair looked perfect. Spain and Prussia wouldn't be making an effort but he would, "You going out?"

"Oui, with Prussia and Spain," France smiled and said in response, Canada's faced dropped. Canada liked Prussia and Spain but it was hard to trust France with them in case France were to ever meet someone more prettier than himself.

"Oh," Canada said sighing and France frowned noticing this. It had been a long time since he had hanged around with Prussia and Spain due to the fact that he had been spending time with Canada. He didn't get much time to hang around with others, "I thought this was going to be a night in together,"

"Canada, I rarely get to see them," France said still concentrated on his hair in the mirror. Canada gave yet another sigh, "I promise I'll stay in tomorrow, just one night,"

"But … where are you's going?"

"Just the bar," France replied as he finished off with his hair. As he started to walk out of the bathroom in the hotel room him and Canada were sharing, Canada followed him

"...Are their girls at this bar?"

"Canada," France said finally getting why Canada was asking, "I would never...,"

"How can I be sure?" Canada sighed, "You're just being you,"

"But I love you too much to-" France stopped. Canada started to cry. It was silence for a few moments, France really wanted to go out with Prussia and Spain but Canada was getting worked up, thinking France was going to cheat on him.

_You're just being you._

France never thought about that before. He knew that he was somewhat promiscuous but he didn't think that it was who he was. It made him feel bad because that was what Canada was getting worked up about so France shook his head. He could miss tonight, he doubted he would miss anything interesting anyway, just the same stuff that usually happens every time they used to go.

"Now, there's no need to cry," France said going over to hug Canada.

"I'm sorry," Canada mumbled nuzzling his face in France's shirt, "I shouldn't overreact, you have every right to go out without me,"

"... I don't have to though," France sighed, "I'll stay in tonight,"

Canada looked up. He wasn't doing it on purpose. He was going to feel bad about this but he would rather spend the night with him then be lonely while France could be up to anything. It was a fear of his. Mainly because France had been hanging around America a lot more and Canada's paranoid mind assumed that because of the way France was that there was... but he didn't want to tell France that. He did not control who the other choose to hang around.

However, if this was how to get France to stay in...

No. Canada dismissed it. He wasn't wanting that at all. Well, maybe he did a bit but he wouldn't do that to him. Maybe he did want France to only be his but that was only a small want. He looked up and France and smiled.

"Can we watch a movie tonight?"

France smiled, "Of course, I'll make snacks while you get the film on,"

France never enjoyed horror films. He flinched at the sight of blood while Canada sat looking bored. It was a Australian horror film called _The Loved Ones _about a girl who kidnaps a boy because he didn't take her to prom and she tortures him with her dad. France was flinching at the blood but Canada was unaffected. Canada used to watch gory films with America all the time so he was used to this. He saw this film lying around because America let him borrow it so he thought why not watch it tonight so he can give America it back at the next world meeting. Compared to other horror films, it was kind of tame and but it had a good story line.

After the film, him and France were lying on the sofa together, tired but staying awake with eachother. Canada was fine in France's arms, things were perfect like this. Canada did feel a little bit of guilt but since it meant France stayed, things were okay. Right?

"I am really sorry," Canada said out of no where, "You got yourself ready for nothing,"

"I spent the night with you," France smiled holding onto Canada tighter, "That is something,"

"But I stopped you going out," Canada sighed, "I didn't mean what I said, I'm just paranoid,"

France understood. He knew how people treated Canada as if he were cellophane, "I understand that, I would never abandon you like that,"

"I know," Canada smiled, the other always was nice to him. How could he doubt him? "I know you wouldn't,"

"Good," France said to him, "You need to stop worrying mon amour, It's not a healthy thing all this worrying and it will stress you out,"

Canada sighed and turned his body so he was facing France, "It's not easy you know,"

"Trust me, when you don't worry as much, you will be happier," France smiled placing his hand lightly on Canada's face, "You have nothing to worry about,"

"Okay," Canada said before going in for a kiss. France kissed him back before the other nuzzled into his neck. "I love you, I love you so much," Canada smiled nuzzling in, "You won't leave me?"

"Non, of course not," France said, "I love you mon amour,"

Canada suddenly yawned feeling tired, maybe it was just how comfortable he was in France's arm, "I love you too, papa,"

A/N: Failure!Megan strikes again with a little chapter:) Sorry that it is short. Been annoyingly busy with school exams and counsellors. They've all been really nice about my situation. I got put in a girls group who meet every Tuesday last period to speak about coping with stress. I went with girls who I've probably spoken to twice and it was really nerve wrecking. I hate being in groups of people I don't know and I have anxiety attacks when I get put with someone who I don't speak to but these girls were actually really nice:) It was quite funny:) My counsellor is really nice too so I'm happy. Only thing I wasn't happy with was my maths teacher won't help me with my exams because he said the reason I am stressed is because I am obviously not studying when I do.

Wow that was I long authors note. Oh well, hope you enjoyed!:D I love how fluffy it is compared to when It'll get really dark. If anyone has read "Forced" (another fanfic I wrote) it will be darker than that and more gory:)


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